Don Tops!

And finally the results are out!

Don of our class tops 'em all. Yip yip hurrayyyyyyyy!!

Our class also got the Best Writer in English (Don again) and Malayalam - Anila

Woooo hooooo it is celebration time for the evening batch!!

(Not sure of the other details)

Last day of exams, sniff-sniff sob

Foreword: all places you see sniff-sniff, it is to be understood there is an element of sadness there. Other sounds of sadness in this post are: sob and boo hoo. Ah, also a lot of Malayalam

It has been a year and 7 days since our classes started at Press Club – sniff sniff. Last year on 4 August I went for the first class which was by ONV Kurup sir. And today I wrote the last exam and reached home now – sniff-sniff.

That’s one whole year and [warning: I am showing signs of turning dramatic] and one whole world of experiences… [told you!!]

Today Anila, Divya (description: 2 friends who took the left and right seats next to mine in class:) – and I planned and wore Sari (it is our last day come on girls: when we are sad about something, we wear Sari, that is the rule!). Let us skip the exam-writing part. It didn’t have anything interesting to offer to my sentimental story. Oh this is a sentimental story, by the way. Lets just say I am keeping my notes intact - just in case.

Anyway, after exams the whole class went to the chaya kada next to press club to have chaya and kaapi. Don – (my third friend identified by long hair and 0-class-attendance) – was to pay for all of us. But for some reason the chechi at the tea shop kept thinking it is one of those Sari wearing girls who was to pay, not the mudi valarthiya boy. Chechi asked Divya and she screamed ‘Donnnnnnnnnnnn’ and ran straight to the next junction – the last nnnnn’s of ‘Don’ lasting all the way.

After the coffee we stayed and talked for a while – some of us realizing for the first time what the other classmates looked like and talked like. Anila said ‘ahh Don talks’ and Don said – well Don was advising Anila to quit her job – I lost some part of it so I didn’t catch his reasoning. But the gist of it is he is starting an unemployment agency that would start giving unemployment to employed youth, and in return he charged only a bottle of a particularly strong brand of – emm you know – water?

We waved bye bye to each other. Aneesh and Karthik, my fourth and fifth friends said tata – boo hoo hoo. They looked too happy and I am sure it is like they say in movies – the exterior santhosham covering the interior dukhams.

The boys went one way, the girls another. So us 3 sari-wearing sad-gloomy-depressed dukhithas [what? India is a free country and every Indian has the freedom to walk with their dukhams!] – started walking towards palayam, the next stop.

Chirping all the way – of sadness of course – Anila whined she had to go to office from tomorrow, I whined I had to wake up at 7:30 from tomorrow, Divya whined she did not have a reason to whine (always exaggerate when you are sad: second rule when you are sad). Divya, not able to stand it, left for the church. Anila and I took off to the library. A book-taking later, we were walking back – again sad and upset. Ok maybe I am overdoing rule number 2.

We reached statue and Don came to tell bye bye. Anila sadly and gloomily went to the hostel. The poor girl I am sure is telling her pillow right about now “Sob sob sob and a bottle of sniff, Mr Pillow”.

Donya and I decided to sing our sorrows (rule number 3 when you are sad is you sing). After many attempts we decided, singing was something we had to leave for the singers – no matter how sad we were. After some ronthu chuttals we decided to shake hands and sniff it a night.

Thus ended my kadana katha of one year and 7 days.

But really, there is a heavy feeling inside that I know will remain a few days. But these little things of singing badly together, of walking long for no reason, of talking so much about absolutely nothing, of accepting every invitation for a free coffee or tea, of sitting together in the night and looking up (hoping the sky was an atm machine and looking at it would eject a few good notes), of planning to do a number of things and messing every one of them, of cursing your friends cause they call you at 10 am and tell you its time to wake up, of reading your poems or stories to each other knowing they are the only ones who’d bother to listen (cause they don’t have a choice!), of always reaching late only to find your friends are not even out of bed, of making last-minute change-of-plans and somehow making it happen, of this and that and a lot of things that will only make sense to us loonies – it means the whole world to me. And like I say, a whole world of experiences.

One evening in press club

The time is 5:30 pm. I am walking towards Press Club. I see PKR Sir coming. He says: “How is it going? How come you are breaking practice?”
“Sir?”
“You have come on time for class”
“Oh hehe”

I walk into the building wondering how bad I must have been smelling with all that sweat. I enter the library. I see classmates, friends. I give them some cutlets I got on the way. We share it, laugh at something. Then someone says it is Saraswathy Madam’s class today. Oh-oh where are the papers I ask aloud. I grab one and start reading. Someone has written that Prakash Karat would treat a patient with cancer by giving a band-aid. I start to laugh aloud, realize my classmates are not there anymore. Oh-oh late again?

I dash up the stairs: that was indeed practice unbroken: a privilege only the latecomers get to enjoy. The classroom. Whew, the teacher is not there yet. We start talking. The usual topics come up: unimportant everyday affairs, nonsensical ideas, really bad jokes, and more really bad jokes. I get out for water. The tap misbehaves – starts pouring out water after I close it. I give out a scream seeing the water hit the floor. It went ‘Uhhh ehhhh uhhh ehhh’ – the scream not the water. The teacher comes exactly at that point. She smiles. I smile. I enter the class. I try frantically to find the ceiling fan regulator (now there maybe some who say I am obsessed with electric switches, but I deny it!). It is unfortunately behind the door. And exactly when I find it, the teacher opens the door. “Bam” (or do you say boom? What’s the crashing sound these days?)

Class starts. Feature writing. Teacher is quoting an example: about the different kind of fevers these days. Chicken flu, pig flu, tomato flu (she says in Malayalam: koli pani, panni pani, thakaali pani). Each time I hear her say “thakaali pani” (tomato flu) I laugh aloud. I believe she uses it to rhyme with the others and there is in fact no such fever. It had to be a joke and I look at her face appreciatively: what a sense of humour. Why is no one else laughing though? By the fifth time I start wondering. My friend explains: “Tomato fever is real. It is when you get red bumps on your body.”

Class is over. We walk out. It is only 7 yet. For a few minutes we hang around the entrance steps talking aloud cause we seem to believe that those steps were created with only one purpose: to stand on and shout.
Waving goodbyes, friend and I decide to walk. We walk one full lap to come back to press club – the familiar roads, shops that call out to you “You don’t want an unniyappam today?”, the fading twilight, the glowing streetlights, the night that gets ready to barge into the day, the familiar breeze that hits you – all the rest of it that you have taken for granted over time. It is part of your life now, this is how evenings were spent for a year now.

Not for long. This is the last month of classes. And then we have exams. After next month, it would all stop: a walk in that street, a gathering in the entrance, an idle chat with the teachers, a chair in the class to sit with people you knew so well, and a casual rush up the stairs like it was your very own place…
Do memories work as good as living the moment? Maybe it will. Lets hope so.

Amen Pope! But I think I’ll buy a condom anyway

The Pope has raised a furore by proclaiming that people should not use condoms. This is nothing new. The Vatican’s stated policy has always been against any form of birth control, since they believe that it is god who gives us children (pregnancy) so only he can decide who should get pregnant when and where.

The Pope’s comments have drawn angry reactions from health workers and state governments who denounce it as irresponsible. Especially anti-AIDS workers say that it has been proved scientifically that the use of condoms help to prevent AIDS from spreading to a great extent. When the Pope, who is the Roman Catholic guy closest to a Roman Catholic god, makes a proclamation it could have far-reaching consequences.

Well at least I’m glad it was the Pope, not the head of any other religious sect like the Ayatollah Khomeini or the VHP chief, because any protest against their remarks would invite violent reactions. To tell the truth most of the Catholics I know go to church every Sunday but hardly care what is being preached. What they need to know about their faith is in the Bible and that is all that matters.

So anyway the condom companies need not panic or give away free condoms as everything will go on as before.

But seriously I think we should respect science as mush as we respect religion. And I think we should not wait until Judgment Day to vote on whether what the Pope said was right. Lets say it now, with respect: “Amen Pope! But I think I’ll buy a condom anyway.”

Speech for Posterity

I hate examinations.

Exams always remind me of the fact that I’m not intelligent. Anyway not intelligent enough. I only have sporadic outbursts of intelligence… which are too insignificant to be counted on any scale. And that doesn’t help in exams.

Why do we even need exams?

I have a dream. [This speech is to be recorded and played on every Republic Day or Independence Day]

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out its true meaning without conducting any examinations.

I have a dream that one day on the green hills of Ponmudi the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood without being asked how much marks they scored in the exams.

I have a dream that one day the state of Kerala, a state sweltering with the heat of the sun, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice, where no exams are held.

I have a dream that little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the number of exams they have passed but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Palayam, little brown boys and brown girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers without having to write any exams.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when everyone, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, Hindus and Muslims will be able to join hands and sing, "Free at last! Free at last! No more exams! Thank God Almighty, no more exams! We are free at last!"

[Incidentally son of Martin Luther King, who gave the original “I have a dream” speech, is coming to Kerala today, the 23^rd]

The Present Continuous

Following is a conversation that took place between a student in our class [“C”] and our English teacher teaching tenses.

Teacher: Another e.g. for present continuous - C - are you reading a novel now?

C: Yes I am reading a novel now.

Teacher: Now? No you are not reading a novel now. You are sitting in the class now.

C: Oh! But I am reading a novel at home. So can I say I am reading a novel now?

Teacher: You cannot say you are reading a novel now but you can say you are reading a novel.

C: So I can say I’m reading a novel when I’m actually not reading a novel.

Teacher: But you are reading a novel?

C: No I’m sitting in the class now.

Teacher: No, I mean, not now, but you are reading a novel?

C: Yes I am reading a novel.

Teacher: So you can say that.

C: Say what?

Teacher: That you are reading a novel.

C: Now?

Teacher: No, not now.

C: You mean, I should not say ‘now’.

Teacher: Say what now?

C: Not say I’m reading a novel now.

Teacher: But you said you are reading a novel.

C: No…err…Yes.

Teacher: So now it’s ok?

C: ‘Now’ is ok?

Teacher: No! ‘Now’ is not ok.

C: Oh! Ok

Teacher: Let‘s go on to the next topic - the Simple Present. Any more doubts.

Hand goes up

Teacher: Yes?

C: So I can say I am reading a novel … even though I am not reading a novel … which means…

[By this time the rest of the class had entirely lost it and I happily fell asleep so I had no idea how it ended.]

Veli Clean-up on Sunday

The tidycity.org project is going to do a clean up of Veli beach this Sunday, February 8th. The idea of these clean up initiatives, is to send across a message, that every single person can make a difference. More than a clean up, the team intends to promote an awareness about keeping our cities clean.

More details about the drive are available at the website http://tidycity.org


Those who are interested to join the tidycity campaign, can subscribe to the mailing list, available in the website.

നൈസ് പുപ്പ്യ്സ്

Disaster at Pooja

This is a tragic story of unfathomable depths. Everyone please make sure you have a handkerchief to wipe your tears before you read on.

This is the story of how we lost a game of cricket and how the disaster changed our lives forever.

The year 2008. A bunch of guys working together at Cochin.

We registered for a cricket tournament being held at the famous Pooja Ground. 7-over matches.

None of us were professional cricketers but loved to play. So we got together a team of 11, 2 substitute players, a coach and a team manager (myself). We went and watched the other teams play and thought to ourself “This is going to be easy. We can win”. Like our captain said these guys were just striking the ball wildly and did not have the technical expertise.

We practised daily at our nearby school ground. Finally the big day arrived. Before that we had to decide on a name. Most of the other teams had silly, ordinary names like NCC or MCC[place name+Cricket Club]. We needed something grand and finally struck upon “SBL - THE BLACK AND WHITE STALLIONS”. In fact the commentator had to hand over the mike to one of us every time he had to announce the team name.

We lost the toss and had no idea it was just a sign of what was to come. They chose batting and we laughed at their foolishness. The first over was bowled by Sumodh, whose action often reminded us of a fighter plane firing missiles at the enemy. That day he chose to bowl after only a short run up. First mistake. It was only after the game did we realise that what made us afraid of his bowling was his run up and the expression on his face and that the ball itself was harmless.

The first ball went for a six. We shouted “Never mind”.

The second ball went for a six. We shouted “Never mind”.

The third ball went for a six. We knew we were in trouble.

When the guy who hit seven consecutive sixes became out, to a catch (which turned out to be the only catch we would take), we went wild with cheers.

The next guy who walked in hit 13 sixes - consecutively. Was some sort of a record at the ground, again which would only be the beginning of a lot of records.

We could only watch in anguish as balls disappeared into all corners of the stadium, some of them out of the stadium as even the organisers couldn’t keep up with the scoring. Finally when the massacre was over they had scored over 150 runs in 7 overs.

When our team walked out of the ground with drooping shoulders our coach had a brilliant idea and shouted “Great! So its a batting pitch. All the better for us”. Immediately the smiles returned and everyone’s confidence was restored.

The second innings began. Our star batsman Rocky was at the crease. We screamed for blood; “give them a taste of their own medicine” we shouted.

First ball. The cheers reached a crescendo. Rocky mightily swings his magic bat and…

He’s out.

Silence. Disbelief.

To make a long story short we didn’t hit a single six. We didn’t hit a single four. Hell We didn’t even get to hit the ball at all, I think. No we didn’t get all out. Only nine wickets fell. Pradeep top scored with 7 not out. We scored 23/9 in seven overs. Lost the game for 130 runs - the biggest margin in the tournament - the final record to break that day.

To say we ‘lost’ would be an understatement. We were a failure in batting, bowling and fielding - an utter disaster. The crowd made fun of us only at the beginning. Towards the end of the game even the rival team looked at us with pity and sympathy - which was even more unbearable.

While sleeping that night at around 2 am suddenly someone woke me up. I switched on the light looked into the face of the captain. “I will never play cricket again in my whole life” he said.

I sighed.

“Me too”

Modern trends violating ethics

The front page editorial titled “neethidevathayude mudapetta kannukalude sukam” published by the “kerala kaumudi” news paper on 18/12/2008 was a misleading distorted material. “kerala kaumudi” has no right to degrade any of the Judicial proceedings or publish anything that brings down the image of the Judiciary in the public.It is absolutely unethical and clear violation of law.such tendencies cannot be glorified.Media should avoid questioning Judiciary for mere sensationalism.

Tidy City initiative

There is a clean city initiative taken up by a few people in the Trivandrum city. Activities of the initiative are written about in the blog http://tidycity.org/blog

They are planning a museum clean up this Sunday, as one of the first actions. 'They' includes the author of this post as well :-)

The museum clean up is to happen on Sunday, February 1st around 4 pm in the afternoon. A clean city is one we all argue about, and think we can do nothing about. To prove this wrong, to prove that there is a part each individual plays - is one of the firt messages that the initiative tries to drive across. We cant force others to clean up, but we can try to inspire them. We can make them think before they throw something on the streets the next time. Thats a lot.

Everyone is welcome to join the cause. Those who are interested can comment in the tidycity blog and make their voices heard.

Welcome to the world of Blogs

Since the beginning of this century Blogs have been very popular throughout the planet. Blogging has turned out to be the easiest way to express and publish yourself. Here are some terms that are related to blogs:

* vlog - A blog comprising videos
* sketchblog - a site containing a portfolio of sketches
* photoblog - one comprising photos
* tumblelogs - Blogs with shorter posts and mixed media types
* Blogosphere - The collective community of all blogs
* blogroll - increasing popularity through affiliation
* Blogware - software specifically designed for creating and maintaining weblogs
* Moblog - combination of "mobile" and "blog". A blog featuring posts sent mainly by mobile phone, using SMS or MMS messages
* edublog - a blog written by someone with a stake in education

(these are only a few of the hundreds of blog-related terms - anyone is free to contribute some more)

The term "weblog" was coined by Jorn Barger on 17 December 1997. The short form, "blog," was coined by Peter Merholz, who jokingly broke the word weblog into the phrase we blog in the sidebar of his blog Peterme.com in April or May of 1999.